"The LORD remembers us and will bless us; He will bless the house of Israel, He will bless the house of Aaron, He will bless those who fear the LORD-- small and great alike. May the LORD make you increase, both you and your children. May you be blessed by the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. The highest heavens belong to the LORD, but the earth He has given to man. It is not the dead who praise the LORD, those who go down to silence; it is we who extol the LORD, both now and forevermore. Praise the LORD!" Psalm 115:12-18
Sunday, January 2nd
163) A good day- You know the saying about "waking up on the wrong side of the bed"? Well today our daughter woke up on the on the ornery, stubborn, going-to-test-every-boundary side of the bed. Initially, it didn't seem like it was going to be that kind of a day. There was a lull. Things started out fairly well. She did better than normal during the first part of the church service. Then all of a sudden the hammer fell, and when it fell, it fell hard. The rest of the day was one scuffle after another. It seemed as though if we turned around for two seconds she was into something she shouldn't be, and even if we didn't look away, she was just testing us, etc. It was a tough day as a parent, but it makes me appreciate all of the many good days we have with our daughter all the more. The good days outnumber and outweigh the tough and they help get me through these rough days because I know that tomorrow is a new day.
Monday, January 3rd
164) Neighborliness- At all our past residencies, we have never really gotten to know any of our neighbors. I would be lying if I said we were quite close with our neighbors here, but I do chat with some of them fairly regularly. There is one lady, across the way, who has been quite sweet , kept track of our traveling, etc. An of offer she made several months back came in most handy this evening. It wasn't anything huge nor was it an inconvenience for her- just one of those neighborly offers, but it was a wonderful blessing to us.
Tuesday, January 4th
Time- and right now, I find it has been a blessing in two ways.
165) Time never stops- I am certain there are situations where this seems likes a detrimental thing, but in so many ways, it can be a blessing. When we find ourselves in situations that are less than desirable, we can usually know that this too shall pass. Time never stops. I know I have gone into separations from Drew, thanks to the Army, thinking I would never make it through because it seemed like such a long period of time, but we have survived them all. Usually the time went quicker than I imagined. The same can be said for difficult training periods with our daughter. Of course we are always training her concerning one or more things, but it seems like some times or certain situations are more difficult. Those times can feel like you will never get through, but you do- usually quicker than you could realize. Time may not have the ability to heal every wound- as the old saying would have you believe, but it can help to soften memories and open doors to forgiveness.
166) My available time- I find that being a stay-at-home mom and having a wealth of available time has been a huge blessing and continues to be so. With our daughter's dietary troubles, I have spent numerous hours researching topics and recipes, and I have the time to make many items from scratch that I might otherwise not feel up to doing.
Wednesday, January 5th
167) Sunsets- I was running errands this evening and had the joy of driving as the sun was setting. I was struck by the absolute beauty of the scene before me. The view was gorgeous, truly gorgeous. Th sky stretched out before me in shades of deep pinkish-orange close to the western horizon and then faded like rolling waves into a steely grey blue. I was in awe of the amazing and beautiful painting that was before my eyes. For really, is that not what the sunrises and sunsets are? The most wonderful, intricate and unique pieces of artwork, painted by God, displayed in the sky for all to see.
Thursday, January 6th
168) Confidence- As a first time parent, this is something that can be here one minute and gone the next, especially when you are getting advice or contrary opinions from those whom you feel should have more knowledge in a given area. Slowly, ever so slowly, I am learning to combine all the advice, opinions and professional insight with my first-hand knowledge our our little girl, the insight I have from being with her nearly twenty-four hours a day. I compare it all side by side and am learning to trust myself instead of being tossed around by the waves of every dissenting opinion. Confidence can be such a blessed thing.
Friday, January 7th
169) Commissary- I do a majority of our grocery shopping at the commissary on base. When it comes to items like meat, breakfast cereals, our daughter's milk, etc., we really just cannot beat the prices. There are some items that I still prefer to buy at other grocery stores, but I have found that for a majority of our shopping, the commissary is more economical. Recently I have made some decent grocery trips to regular grocery stores for various reasons and I was only reminded what a blessing the commissary is.
Saturday, January 8th
170) Consistency- So I get excited about our daughter's obedience one day and am reminded of our own need for continued consistency the next. The lesson and training is far from over. Perhaps Phase I has been completed: our daughter knows what is expected of her. Given a specific situation, she may know right from wrong, but now we move into Phase II: reinforcement and consistent boundary setting. More or less, what was right yesterday is still right today and what was wrong yesterday is still wrong today; we just have to show her that remains true and we mean it. Luckily for me, I have the greatest example of such consistency. God has been a wonderful Heavenly Father is this aspect. He has given both Drew and I the perfect example of Fatherly discipline and consistency which we can seek to emulate and a reminder that, though it may seem rough now, it is all for the love of our daughter.
"And have you completely forgotten this word of encouragement that addresses you as a father addresses his son? It says, “My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.” ... Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of spirits and live! They disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." Hebrews 12:5,6,9-11
Sunday, January 9th
171) Stepping out of my comfort zone- Most people who know me have a hard time believing this fact, but I can be quite shy. It only comes out when I am in new situations and usually when I am in medium to large groups. Once I get to know a person/people, it completely fades away to the extent that people cannot believe I would claim to be shy. Yet I feel completely justified in saying that it is outside of my comfort zone to approach someone I have never met before and strike up a conversation. Today though, that was just what I needed to do and I did and am so glad that I did. I met a wonderful couple, (not that I ever doubted they would be otherwise) and hopefully it is just another step towards some exceptional relationships/friendships here in Albuquerque.
Monday, January 10th
172) Changing things up- This one is tough to explain. All I can say was that thinking outside the box a little and changing things up some made a world of difference and it's a lesson I shouldn't forget.
Tuesday, January 11th
173) A 1980's Army-issued sweater- My father-in-law gave it to me shortly after I married Drew. It is an exceptionally warm sweater without being bulky. At the time I received it, I had no idea when I would wear it. We lived in Texas and from Texas, we moved to Tennessee, Alabama and then Florida- with no really cold weather to speak of. Nonetheless, I kept the sweater because it was special- a gift from my father-in-law- something he had owned and likely worn while he served in the Army over in Germany. Now that we are stationed here in Albuquerque, I am finding that the sweater is not only special because of it's history, but it is also quite useful (and although I doubt the Army was going for it, I also think it has a certain sense of style to it.) What a blessing it has been on some cold mornings and nights when we have been out and about in the cold, cold High Desert air.
Wednesday, January 12th
174) The little things- Some days just kind of go by. There really isn't anything too eventful. Take today for instance. Today I did laundry and worked on a crocheting project, but it was a day filled with lots of wonderful little moments of joy. Of course most of them were thanks to our little daughter. I love watching her play, grow and mature. It was so wonderful to simply ask her to pick up her toys and watch her go about picking up every last one, not only without argument but with joy- and it made me laugh to watch her put everything in the EXACT place I set things. (What have I done to her? Poor girl!) I couldn't help but smile when she came out of her room with a blanket and watched as she tried to wrap it around her shoulders, only to realize she wanted to look like me. (I had been walking around with a blanket around my shoulders.) And I love how she thinks the little key that goes to our luggage lock will open anything. She uses it on the fire box, the filing cabinet, screws on her toys, and she even tried to start her push car with it.
Then again, I suppose it's the little things that could make up the majority of this list I have created up to this point. Those are the ones that keep us smiling and make each day beautiful.
Thursday, January 13th
175) Caffeine reaction- I do not typically consume much caffeine. I don't drink coffee or tea and rarely have sodas, so when I do put caffeine into my system, it has a strong effect on me. Generally I have seen this as a bad thing- primarily because all of migraine medicine includes a considerable amount of caffeine. What that means for me is that I really cannot use any of that medication to counteract a migraine after about 2 pm. If I do, I will end up roaming our house until the wee hours of the next morning. Not exactly ideal for mending my headaches. Today I started to think about the whole situation and something struck me. Perhaps my strong reaction to caffeine has a down side, but it is also a blessing because caffeine, which is known to help alleviate migraines, is a tool at my disposal. I have often been in a situation where I couldn't take any more medicine due to dosage restrictions but I needed something to help cut the intensity of the pain. I would use a highly caffeinated soda, and that almost always, without fail, at least took the edge of the migraine. So perhaps, my reaction limits how much I use prescribed medicines, but it also has made the use of those medicines more effective as well as opening doors to supplemental means to address the pain.
Friday, January 14th
176) His voice- Sometimes all it takes is hearing Drew's voice to calm me down and brighten my day.
Saturday, January 15th
177) Better things to come- I would be lying if I didn't admit this has been a tougher few weeks. I have struggled with headaches and migraines and to top it off, this afternoon, I have just felt yucky. I don't know exactly what it is, but I am sick. The one thing that ran through my head over and over was the opening verses from Revelations 21. "Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” Revelation 21:1-4 What a comfort this has been to me during those times in my life when I have just thought I was never going to feel good or be without pain again.
Sunday, January 16th
178) Drew's important role- Given work schedules, possible deployments, other separations, and more, I knew before our daughter was even born that it would be very important to help ensure that Drew and she had every opportunity to build up a strong relationship. I always wanted Drew to be able to be as involved with her as he could be but knew there would be times when it was hard. I would say we have done a fairly good job, though earlier on, we didn't notice it as much because she was so young and her memory was so short-lived. Now however, her memory has expanded greatly. Lately Drew has had several times when he didn't make it home in time for our daughter's bedtime routine. It is incredible the difference between when he is there for bedtime and when he is not. I cannot lie; it is hard to do bedtime without Drew. Our daughter is not very cooperative and usually she ends up missing out on part of the bedtime story because of her behavior, etc. Although it is hard, it's wonderful to know and see just how important Drew is to our daughter's daily routine. I never doubted it was true, but the evidence is incredible to behold. Daddies really can be an anchor for their family, and Drew certainly is one for this family.
Monday, January 17th
179) A few photos, contact paper, and some magnets- Mix them together in one quick and easy project, and I had something to help make the days a little easier for our little girl.
180) A decent-sized cardboard box- Well it's the day for recognizing the blessings in the simplest of forms. Another one today was the box our daughter's diapers came in. We buy them in bulk to help with the cost, so the box is a little larger than what you normally see in Walmart, etc. Today it made so many wonderful and amazing toys. It was a hiding place for our daughter, a house for her little people, a slot for magnets to slip through, and of course, something new to climb in, over and around. This box entertained our daughter from dinner until bedtime and helped expand her imagination.
A Parting Thought: As I prepare to publish this latest post, I cannot end it without the words from the song "You Raise Me Up." I heard them on the radio today and felt that they had truly embodied my last few weeks. Compared to so many people, my life is a piece of cake, but still over the last few weeks, it has been more of a struggle than usual. If it were not for the Lord- His grace, love, care, comfort, strength, guidance, providence and blessings- I would have been in much worse shape than I am today. Instead as I prepare to end this day, I find myself humming. I am looking forward to this next week with anticipation and hope. The Lord is good. Blessed be His name!
When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;
When troubles come and my heart burdened be;
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,
Until you come and sit awhile with me.
You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.
There is no life - no life without its hunger;
Each restless heart beats so imperfectly;
But when you come and I am filled with wonder,
Sometimes, I think I glimpse eternity.
You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.
(You Raise Me Up - Selah)
